Have you heard of the saying “Too much of a good thing can be a bad thing”? Well, this holds true even for self-sufficiency and independence. When we cross the line from healthy independence to hyper-independence, our well-being can take a hit.
Do you resonate with any of these?
- You’re self-reliant and it’s hard to ask for help.
- You have a hard time saying no.
- You take on more responsibilities even if you’re overwhelmed.
- You seek perfection and may neglect self-care.
- It’s hard to delegate tasks.
- You’re emotionally guarded and it’s difficult to trust others.
- You tend to isolate and have few close relationships.
These are hallmark signs of hyper-independence. It’s tough navigating life on your own, and when you’re a parent, white-knuckling it solo, the “I can do it all” mentality can be a recipe for burnout.
Now that we recognize we might be trying to carry too much of the load on our own, let’s reflect on why this is happening. With a better understanding, we can take steps to practice trust and share the load.
- What experiences during childhood might have shaped your mindset? Were you praised for doing things on your own? Was there a lack of parental presence?
- How do you feel when you ask for help?
- Do you feel like you don’t deserve help? If so, why?
- What are the negative effects of trying to do everything on your own? Are you stressed, burnt out, or resentful towards others?
Then, it might be time to turn a “weakness” into a strength, as healthy independence is a great thing! Find a better balance by learning to Task, Trust, and Talk!